Why Nice Guys Can’t Get Laid

The Revolution didn’t exactly go as planned.

Like all Leftists, Karl Marx fucking loved science — so much so that he presented his harebrained Hegelian junk philosophy as a scientific blueprint for the progress of History.  Communism shall be achieved, comrades — it’s inevitable! — but before that, we must sink to the depths of industrial capitalism.

This isn’t a “maybe;” this must happen, said Marx.  The necessity of passing through industrial capitalism was a dogma of the faith, such that the Mensheviks, who were just as committed to the Revolution as Lenin’s boys, actually favored a compromise with Russia’s few industrialists after the Tsar abdicated.  Only when capitalism’s productive forces have exhausted themselves, Marxist theory says, will the “contradictions” be sufficient for the Communist “synthesis.”

The Russian Revolution, then, baffled orthodox Marxists.  Russia was still half-feudal; they were decades, maybe centuries, away from having the necessary preconditions for Communism.  Only fully mature industrial capitalist states — the US, Britain, France, and especially Germany — were ripe for Revolution.  What the hell happened?

Guys like Lenin and Antonio Gramsci (we’re getting to the “get laid” part, I promise) quickly knocked together an answer.  Marx wasn’t wrong — the Scriptures are never wrong!  He just needed a little modification, Council of Nicaea-style.  Turns out Onkel Karl skipped a step.  The Proletariat can’t develop “revolutionary consciousness” on its own.  It needs a “vanguard party” to do that for them.  Every do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do, jet-setting, three-home-owning People’s Champion is, of course, a high ranking member of that vanguard party….

… as are all the tenured radicals down at the local U., in Hollywood, and throughout the Ed Biz.

And now, as promised, the “get laid” part:

Section Break!

Section Break!

“Developing revolutionary consciousness” means, in practice, teaching the Proles who and how to hate.  Getting along, curbing the worst excesses, muddling through… all these are actually worse than the worst capitalist exploitation, because they make the Proles wonder if maybe a full-blown Revolution, with gulags and secret police and whatnot, is really necessary after all.  Can’t we just, you know, put in some safeguards?  Maybe two or three “branches” of government?  With some checks, and/or balances?  Or maybe — just spitballin’ here — maybe some kind of list or “bill” of “rights” that limits the state’s power?

Nyet! Only Revolution will make benefit glorious utopia that Marx promised is just around the corner.  Rage, therefore, must always be stoked white hot.  Every possible source of enmity must be found, focused, and turned up to eleven.

Racism works great for this, which is why you’ll find Soros’s filthy, Nazi-collaborating hands all over movements like Black Lives Matter.  Or it used to, anyway.  The problem is Chronic Negro Fatigue.  Most of us have had it with Jesse, Al, and the rest of the Reverends, not to mention Colin Kaepernick, gentle giant Michael Brown, mouth-frothing lunatic antisemite Farrakhan, and the rest.  See below — that’s modern America’s take on “racism.”  The Vanguard Party has pushed racial hatred just about as far as it will go.  Not being stupid, America’s Blacks — who are only 14% of the population, and know it — aren’t going to start a race war; they’d be wiped out in a week.  Further racial grievance mongering is a nonstarter, Revolution-wise.


Sexual tension, though, is a source of animosity that’s as old as mankind.  Convince women they’re the Most Oppressed People Ever, and nobody’s safe — you can always take a detour around the inner city; you can’t avoid your Mom and Sister.

So that’s what they did, our Bolsheviks.  They invented Women’s Lib, which became Third Wave Feminism, which became Wymyn’s Studies, which became the pulsating, mirror-glittering shit show we see before us hourly.  From my considerable experience of Wymynists, both professionally and personally, I deduce that they believe the following propositions, with a catholic ardor that would make Torquemada blush:

  • No matter what I wear, do, or say, viewing me as a sex object is rape…
  • …unless I want you to view me as a sex object, in which case not viewing me as a sex object is rape, no matter what I’m wearing, doing, or saying.  Furthermore,
  • everything I wear, do, and say is empowering; not acknowledging this is rape, and furthermore,
  • nothing I wear, do, or say is my fault, because Patriarchy robs me of all agency, even though my very existence is super empowering; and furthermore
  • all of this is subject to change without notice, with no statute of limitations.

No man in his right mind would approach a woman like this, and yeah yeah, NAWALT, but seriously, they’re all like that.  They can’t help it.  It’s the most insidious consequence of propaganda — if all you’ve ever been told is lies, it’s almost impossible to see the truth, even when it’s right there in front of your face.  “Gee, Tom sure seems like a nice guy… but he’s probably a slavering pervert.”

Nor does it help that social media encourages men to be slavering perverts.  Women aren’t stupid — they know that

  1. a cleavage shot on Facebook will get them 6,000 comments;
  2. all from thirsty betas desperately hoping their comment will get them laid.

This is, of course, by design.  It effectively eliminates nice guys, by turning “nice guy” into the ultimate loser stereotype.  Thanks to all this, on social media — which these days is indistinguishable from IRL — normal interpersonal relations between men and women are now impossible.  Talk to a woman, and you’re either a Machiavellian player or a weaselly little wannabe rapist.

See what I mean?  Sex — gender, whatever — is the biggest and most sensitive class divide of them all.  The Revolution can’t happen without hatred, and thanks to all this, fully half the population are Certified Class Enemies.  I wouldn’t wish modern dating on anyone.




Ain’t No Way to Hide Your Lyin’ Eyes

Tech It Girl Elizabeth Holmes has been charged with “massive fraud.”  Who ever could’ve seen that coming?


I’ll leave it to the STEM types among the Nine Readers to sort out just how jaw-droppingly implausible Holmes’s claims actually were (although I must say that even I, a tech illiterate who has to pull off a sock to count past ten, briefly skimmed a summary of Theranos and thought “but blood doesn’t work like that!”).  I just want to comment briefly on the total insanity of anyone, anywhere, giving the girl in that picture one thin dime.

We’re just starting to scratch the surface of the looming social catastrophe that is chix-in-STEM.  First, and most important, we mix up “could” and “should.”  Lots of women are good at math, chemistry, biology, etc.  There are more women than men enrolled in med school, for example, and I have no doubt they’ll perform as well as the men.  Problem is, med school is brutal, and residency is worse.  Four years of college, plus four more of med school, plus three to seven years of residency (at 120 hours per week) is…carry the one… divide by the cosine… approximately 11-16 years of delayed family formation.  I’ve been around a lot of these gals, and their Match.com profiles, if they were honest, would all look something like this:

Hi! I’m 32 years old and haven’t been on a date in 10 years.  I make $300K a year, but I’m half a mil in debt.  I own a house that I’m never in, because I work 100 hours a week to make the nut on that half mil of med school debt.  My hobbies include sleeping, napping, and wolfing down greasy carb-laden takeout.  The men I’m around all day are either sociopathic alpha males or trembly dorks, and both of them work as much as I do.  Oh, and I really want a baby.  Like, NOW.

What a catch, right?  And it gets worse, as these women are all told that the reason they can’t find true love is because “men are intimidated by strong, intelligent women.”  Which, as doctors, they of all people should know is bullshit — evolutionary biology being what it is, women date across and up.  A plumber isn’t intimidated by your MD; he just knows he’s wasting his time hitting on you.  Given a sure thing with a plumber versus a one-in-a-thousand shot with a brain surgeon, your female MD goes with the brain surgeon, every single time.  Biomechanics is god.

So you’ve got a lot of very unhappy women out there, who a) feel as though they’re letting the Sisterhood down if they drop out of med school, and b) can’t drop out of med school anyway, as they’ve already committed half a decade and half a zillion dollars getting in.  And these are doctors, who still have to have a foot (or a few toes, at least) in the social world, due to daily interactions with patients.  The further up the nerd food chain you go, the less regular contact with the hu-mans.

STEM-capable women who actually go into STEM, in other words, are STEMing themselves right out of the gene pool, and making themselves miserable in the process.

And then there are the guys.  The neckbearded permavirgin STEM guy is a stereotype, but stereotypes exist because they’re true.  You can tell how screwed up the STEM sociosexual market is by taking a quick gander at the girls who get their dander up.  Don’t say I didn’t warn you:

Zoe Quinn

Zoe Quinn

Rebecca Watson, a.k.a. SkepChick

Rebecca Watson, a.k.a. SkepChick

I’m not making fun of these ladies’ looks (ok, ok, I’m not just making fun of these ladies’ looks).  I’m all for people finding love, but even if I were single, if Zoe up there offered me a beej, I’d pass.  Not,I hasten to add, because I was some kind of mack daddy with dozens of spinning plates back in my single days, but because I was a normal guy in a normal job and every single female coworker I had looked better.  Guys are likelier to score an empty netter — again, biomechanics — but it’s contextual; as a normal guy in a normal job, I figured I at least had a decent shot with someone a lot better.  It’s only under conditions of direst scarcity that Quinn, Watson, et al are teh hotness.

Which brings us back to Elizabeth Holmes.  She looks like a creepy autist to me — if you kill Steve Jobs, eat his heart, and wear his black turtleneck, you’ll gain his powers! — but let’s stipulate she’s a 6…. to normal guys.  In her context, she’s a knockout.  How did anyone, reading that prospectus and gazing into those eyes, give this woman a dime?  They were thinking with the wrong head.  It’s as simple as that…. and it was a $700 million mistake.

And we’re going all-out to get more women in STEM.  Think about that for a second.  There are plenty of women who can do the work… up to a point.  What happens when they can’t?  Men in the same situation just live with it.  Maybe you topped out with C++ or whatever, and hey, that’s fine, there’s a decent middle class life to be made there.  But for men, coding chops is all we’ve got; our place on the nerd food chain depends solely on what we can do with a keyboard.  Women, though, have a whole other road to success, and that’s how you get a nearly billion dollar fraud like Theranos.

So what happens when the girls in the STEM pipeline right now top out?  Where do they top out?  If they’re just doing Math Club in high school to score a killer extracurricular on their Vassar apps, ok, fine.  But what if they choose to major in it?  Weed-out courses only work if you can’t cheat.  Was Holmes really a biology ace at Stanford?  Or did she get some help from thirsty male classmates, professors, administrators?  We’ll never know, and it doesn’t matter now…. for her.  But for the new generation of STEM ladies coming up?  I don’t think it’s going to end well.



We Were Marxists Once, and Young

Only a few of the most ideologically enstupidated believe Dialectical Materialism anymore, but for the last century or so, Marxist history simply was history.  “Social class” is pretty good shorthand for a bunch of correlated phenomena, and there’s an economic component to everything, so History as the clash of class interests can’t go too far wrong.  Drop Dialectical Materialism, as even the Commies did in practice, and you’ve got a fairly robust interpretive method.

So robust, in fact, that we Americans started taking it for granted, even when it was obviously wrong.  For instance, “everybody knows” that poverty causes crime, even though (as Theodore Dalrymple says) if that were true, we’d still be living in caves.  “Poverty” here is shorthand for “culture,” which everyone really does know is crime’s true cause.

Which highlights another great seduction of Marxism.  Because, of course, in modern America, “culture” really means “race.”  And though race can’t be fixed, “culture” can… IF “culture” really is just a byproduct (the Commie term d’art is “superstructure”) of economic class.  Poverty causes Ghetto Affective Disorder, so toss enough benjamins into the ‘hood and GAD goes away (with the nifty side benefit of “proving” that “there is no such thing as race” — if race is culture and culture is money, then by the transitive property of equality, race is money).

So long as there’s scarcity, then — so long as “programs” remain “underfunded” — this half-assed Marxism without Marx (henceforth, “Marxism”) is a Get out of Reality Free Card.  Problem is, there’s no scarcity anymore.  When a whole bunch of people really were going to work with no shoes and going to bed hungry at night — as in, say, Tsarist Russia — the culture/poverty connection made superficial sense.  It seemed plausible, at least, that the serf’s glaringly obvious cultural defects stemmed from his truly awful material situation.  If even half the stuff Turgenev wrote about* was even half right, it’s no surprise Ivan Sixpack was such a brute.

But then World War II happened, and we won, and honest-to-god poverty disappeared from our shores.  Nobody in America has gone to bed hungry involuntarily in three generations.  Thanks to the Great Society and its endless ramifications, our “poor” people while away their hours in front of plasma tvs and keel over from diabetes and heart disease .  They’re not poor because they lack money and opportunity; they’re poor because they lack IQ and impulse control.

Prosperity flips Marxism on its head, and it has left the political class rudderless.  The Left, who still like to parade themselves as the champions of The Working Class, quite obviously despise The Working Class, for cultural reasons — guns, Jesus, NASCAR, patriotism, that sort of thing.  But they’re so well-trained to think in culture = economics terms that they can’t pitch their proposals any other way.  In practice, “social justice” is simply old-school, command-economy wealth redistribution — instead of paying for Head Start, say, or raising per-pupil spending in inner city schools, the kulaks are now being squeezed for (even more expensive!) hormone therapies for the mentally ill.  They will tax-and-spend until it kills them, though tax-and-spend is obviously fatal — Marxists to a man, they can do no other.

Alas, so-called “conservatives” are all Marxists, too.  We all know what’s really the matter with Kansas: They’re materially fine, but spiritually dead.  The Left has quite successfully convinced Black Americans that Ghetto Affective Disorder simply IS “Black culture”…. but there’s nothing for the Whites.  (Yes, there are wiggers, but only in upscale, all-white suburbs; white kids who act like this around actual black kids get the shit beaten out of them).  “Conservatism” used to mean (among other things) the knowledge that a man can be materially poor but culturally rich — Western Culture simply IS “culture,” and it’s for everyone, that’s why we have free museums and public libraries.  The modern “conservative” simply hands over the money and lets the “free market” sort it out — you can buy a symphony ticket and hear Beethoven, or you can blow it on MC Funnetick Spellyn’s latest album, it’s out of our hands, who are we to judge?

When the change comes, it will come with lighting speed.  As The Z Man points out here, our politics is still locked into 1992.  Everyone in both parties is a Marxist (in the sense I’ve been describing); the only real “debate” is about gestures and labels.  The last time this happened, change came over just three presidential elections — 1852, 1856, 1860.  I forget what happened after that, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t good.

We’re finally starting to grasp Marxism’s fundamental category error.  Money isn’t culture; culture is culture.  The few folks in our political class not named “Donald Trump” who realize this are still thinking like Marxists — they’re betting that yet more iterations of iCrap on Social Media will keep us docile.  So far they’ve been right…. but that’s just delaying the inevitable.  How much longer, do you think, before the cord cutters who gave up the NFL this fall start giving up other things, like Social Media?  At first they’ll be much happier….

…. and then they’ll be PISSED.  As Z Man likes to say, it’s not going to end well.



*RTWT, but be warned — Dalrymple quotes Turgenev’s story “Mumu” at length.  Is somebody chopping onions in here?  A whole lot of onions?

Race and Science and Culture (Oh My!)

Over on the Hello Kitty of Bloggin, as Morgan puts it, a friend posted:

“The very concept of race has no genetic or scientific basis.” — Craig Venter, DNA sequencing pioneer.

I guess I don’t see race as a bad or good thing, so I scratch my head when I see stuff like this.

On its face, the statement has an absurdity to it. I’d heard it or something like it before, so I looked it up to see what they were trying to say. And there is SOME truth to it, when you look at it in a purely scientific (read: genetic purity) way. But there is more to the universe than science. And this oversimplification appears to be *trying* to do something good, though the effect comes off more like a poke in the eye, which isn’t helpful. So I took this as an opportunity to stop a few echoes with one stone.

What they’re basically saying is that there isn’t enough genetic difference to call people of different relatively subtle, at some level, yet relatively uniform physical characteristics to call us different subspecies – that we’re all basically the same when it comes to biological makeup and mental capacity. Which is true.

There’s speculation (probably true) that eventually there will be enough intermixing to where a lot of those differences are blended out in most areas of the world. Which will be fine by me, but I’ll have been dead for centuries by that time. Maybe millennia.

Now, we call a set of people of different relatively subtle, at some level, yet relatively uniform physical characteristics from the same basic genetic background a “race”, and this is not a useless distinction no matter what geneticists say.

The problem comes when we start pre-judging people based on those characteristics, say, on sight. Evolutionarily speaking, it’s not a bug, it’s a feature. But biology isn’t fair, and culturally, we’ve developed this idea of fairness as important. Which is a GOOD thing. And this, at the core, is why racism is wrong. It’s fundamentally unfair to the person being judged. Regardless of the race of the person being judged. (There are people trying to define that last bit out of the word “racism”, but in doing so, they lose the moral core of why it is wrong in the first place.)

Different groups of us have evolved (and every one of them in the same way) to view humans who look drastically different with skepticism at a level much deeper than our intellects reside. It’s a defense mechanism. An instinctual reflex. This, like many of our other instincts, is something we have to teach out of our offspring — or to put it more correctly, to overrride this instinct — to be what we have come to know as “civilized”. That’s never going to stop. We will need to do this with each generation going forward. It won’t “evolve out” in a generation or two or five or fifty.

We will have to deal with this as a species.

Now this recognition of differences goes beyond physical appearance — and there are differences that register much more strongly than initial reaction to physical appearance. And this is the realm of culture.

A lot of the reason racial prejudices have persisted is — for essentially the same reason these physical differences evolved (genetic isolation of different populations of people), different cultures evolved along with them. And cultural similarities are very very important to how people get along with each other. It’s how we recognize, “hey, this person has basically the same beliefs I do, so I know what to expect from him. He’s not a danger to me” (mimicking this can also be the way sociopaths, even of the same race, gain people’s trust — but I digress). A population of people needs to be consistent enough so that the people in that population know what to expect from others. When we don’t know what to expect, our brains go into chaos mode and our defenses go up.

Here’s the cool thing. It turns out all of that cultural stuff … is software. And it can run in the brain of anyone from any race.

Therefore — there is no such thing as “White” culture or “Black” culture. THESE are the social constructs, far more than are the minor genetic differences that developed among genetically isolated populations that we call “race”. What we see as “race” is real categorical physical differences. What cultural characteristics we project onto those differences … if they’re calling *that* a social construct I’d agree.

I can pluck a baby from anywhere in the world, and raise him here in America and by the time he’s 8 everyone who actually engages with him will indentify him as an American. He will act in a manner that will reassure the people who interact with him that he is not a threat to them or the order of their lives. Depending on how he dresses and cuts his hair and the amount of hardware he has or doesn’t have sticking through his skin in various places, most people will pick up on that before they ever say a word to each other. Or I can raise him in France or any at least western country… same thing.

Contrary to popular belief in some circles … we have come a very VERY long way, especially in America. The [main] reason we see so much of it in America, and in some other western countries is because it is in these countries that we actually have significant racial diversity. So the issue gets pressed in these countries more than in others.  (The other reason is that there are certain political interests that benefit from cultivating cultural division.)

As I was saying earlier, fear of significant difference is an evolved response. I would speculate that … when it comes to race … we will all look much more similar as we intermix before that response evolves out of us — if it ever does — because that response is just a part of a much bigger evolved response — the general fear of the unknown, the uncertain. And at that point … the point will be moot.

Fortunately, we have culture, and if we can come to a point where just about everyone in our country, at least, is culturally similar enough so that we can act as a cohesive group of people. Remember, there is no such thing as white culture or black culture. Culture is not based on skin color. Culture is how we learn to act, and about shared idioms and traditions that glue us together, that help us relate to each other.

In this light, I cannot say I’m on the “diversity is what makes us great” bandwagon. It is not. Diversity is a symptom of greatness, not the cause. The greatness … comes from the culture.

And culture has no color.

The Priesthood of All Believers

“The SJWs ye have always with you,” I’m pretty sure Jesus said at some point.  The trick is managing them.  SJWs have two primal drives:

  1. to boss people around; and
  2. to feel themselves the victim of something.

A healthy society comes up with a career track that maximizes both (for them) while doing minimal damage (to us).

In 20th century America, this was the function of the Ed Biz and its dorky, spastic little brother, the Ivory Tower.  Since kids are natural learners, this system didn’t do too much damage, provided the curriculum stayed close to the three Rs.  Meanwhile, teachers could torment their students at their leisure, while griping about being overworked and underpaid.  Remember this?


Yes, The Man is keeping you down, all right!  What with tenure, great bennies, no overtime, a captive audience, zero daily oversight, a lovely work environment (where you’re the boss!), and oh yeah, fucking summers off, not to mention a week at Thanksgiving and Easter, nearly a month at Christmas, and the eighteen zillion “inservice days” that are an hour’s worth of lecture followed by the “debriefing” down at the “teachers’ lounge.”


All while getting comped at a nice middle class salary.  This goes triple for college, which is one-third the work for three times the pay, plus private offices and no jailbait issues…. and, not coincidentally, three times the “we’re the Most Oppressed People EVAR!” whining.  It’s all by design, and provided there’s a decent economy — as there was almost all the time back in the 20th — nobody is harmed too much by spending a few months a year cooped up with these whackadoodles.

Alas, the good times are over.  Teachers still whine and bitch at astronomical rates — and profs are twenty times worse — but since we’ve all realized by now that the Ed Biz is, in fact, a BIZ, and a highly profitable one at that, all the MOPE cachet is gone… which means the SJWs can no longer fulfill part 2 of their Prime Directive.

As always, the Middle Ages had the right idea.  This is what a priesthood is for.  It’s perfect — you’re taking the world’s sins on your shoulders, plus you get to peer into the sordid private lives of your betters… and punish them!

The first thing we need to do is roll back the Reformation.  Priesthood of all believers?  Hell no.  We’ve got to get back to the days where good, socially conscious parents pledged their excess kids to the cloister when they were barely out of diapers.  You think Sasha and Malia Obama won’t be tormenting us in politics for the next 30 years?  If this were the good old days, we could deal with ’em Hamlet style — “get thee to a nunnery!”

Leftism is Conspicuous Consumption

Via David Thompson, an excellent introduction to the reticulated nonsense on stilts that is graduate school:

I quickly learned that…many of my professors valued paradoxical and obscure arguments. And I got pretty good at making them. In an essay on Wallace Stevens, I concluded by asserting, “If everything is nothing, then that nothingness is everything. For poetry to encompass one, it encompasses the other. When Stevens’s mind of winter descends into the inescapable nothingness of his subjectivity, he has claimed for himself the totality of everything.” I don’t know what this means. But I wrote it and I was rewarded for it.

Every minute I spent in grad school, I wondered: Do professors really believe this shit?  I’m not talking anything so bourgeois as “the truth,” comrades; I’m talking about, do they really believe that the string of words “the inescapable nothingness of his subjectivity” means something?

If so, then they’re the worst teachers on the planet, as “the inescapable nothingness of his subjectivity” is gibberish to me, and I work here!  If it means something, I surely would’ve heard it by now….?

But if it doesn’t mean anything, then what’s the point?  Graduate school is not undertaken on a whim.  It’s long, it’s hard — well, ok, it’s time-consuming — and it’s expensive, in both real money and opportunity cost.  If the point is just to lob increasingly jargonated gibberish at each other, there are plenty of atheist discussion boards and PUA forums that will serve.  Y’all can trust me on this: Nobody — nobody — really understands Lacan, Derrida, Althusser, or the rest of the Froggy Incomprehensibles.  Nobody really understands Wallace Stevens either, for that matter.  That’s because there’s nothing to understand.  They are, as T.S. Eliot — no mean purveyor of gibberish himself — once put it, the hollow men:

We are the hollow men
We are the stuffed men
Leaning together
Headpiece filled with straw. Alas!
Our dried voices, when
We whisper together
Are quiet and meaningless
As wind in dry grass
Or rats’ feet over broken glass
In our dry cellar

Shape without form, shade without colour,
Paralysed force, gesture without motion;

Only after leaving grad school did I grasp it: The point of this stuff is conspicuous consumption.  All Leftism is.

We all know the Left has been bankrupt, in all senses but monetary, since the Sixties.  Everyone they once pretended to care about — the working class, the Negroes (as they then were), women, the handicapped, prisoners, the mentally ill — have proved, on closer inspection, to be repulsive.  Read any Leftist blog or Twitter feed for five minutes; the hate for everyone and everything outside of the author’s little slice of intersectional genderfluid heaven just drips off the screen.  As I’ve said here before, there are only two options when the souls you’ve set out to save turn your stomach: You can embrace the toilet, or aestheticize it.  Old-school Commies went with door #1, which is why old-school Commies acted like drunk longshoremen and looked like them, too:


Behind door #2, though, life is good.  The inhabitants generally aren’t much more attractive  — Emma Goldman up there actually looks pretty good compared to a typical Wymyn’s Studies prof — but the environment can’t be beat.  Nowhere is life cleaner, easier, safer, and whiter than the faculty ghetto in an upscale college town.  But… Isn’t this the very life that grubby bourgeois wannabes strive for?  There’s no sense in renovating a charming little four-bed, three-and-a-half bath Colonial in a good school district if your next door neighbor is something gauche, like a software engineer or a plumber, i.e. the rude mechanicals you’re ideologically supposed to love, but actually loathe for their apelike attachment to things like guns, NASCAR, and Jesus.

Hence the jargonized marxoblather.  Your plumber may lead a material existence little different from your own — he might even drive a slightly nicer car, and none of his fixtures leak — but he has to work for it, the poor dumb bastard.  With his hands.  He simply doesn’t have the free time to plow through the prose of a Certified Genius of Colour like Homi Bhabha:

If, for a while, the ruse of desire is calculable for the uses of discipline soon the repetition of guilt, justification, pseudo-scientific theories, superstition, spurious authorities, and classifications can be seen as the desperate effort to “normalize” formally the disturbance of a discourse of splitting that violates the rational, enlightened claims of its enunciatory modality.

This is virtue-signaling of the highest order.  Not only does it say “I am an enlightened being who knows what ‘enunciatory modality’ means,” it says, furthermore, “I am the kind of person who deals with enunciatory modalities daily.  Anybody can unclog a toilet; it takes long years of very expensive training to learn to write a sentence where you can’t even identify the fucking main verb on the first read-through.”

Seen as conspicuous consumption, all the PoMo Left’s attitudes make sense.  They love trannies, for instance, because they — the trannies — are so elaborately, baroquely useless.  If I had the kind of time and money to burn that this organism (eye bleach warning!) must have in order to maintain its fantasy existence, I’d be well on my way to owning a pro football team.  And so on down the line: The “wingless golden-skinned dragonkin” who got James Damore fired care more about fucking pronouns in a single day than I’ve cared about anything, collectively, in my entire life.  Time is the most precious commodity of all; an ocean of gold won’t buy you a single second more.  Spending all that time worrying about intersectionality tells the world that you’re incalculably rich, without having anything so vulgar as bling to wave around.

Pop Goes the Higher Ed Bubble!

I’ll give the Hollywood hypocrites this: They’ve solved America’s student loan debt crisis.  I’m not sure which of the valid forms of the syllogism this is, but follow me here:

  • You can get anything you want in academia if you complain long enough;
  • Women are 56% of undergrad enrollments, and rising;
  • Every Liberal in America believes there’s a “campus rape culture;”
  • As #MeToo has shown, being an impeccable Progressive won’t save you;


  • we’re about to see a wave of accusations hit academia that’ll make Harvey Weinstein look like a choirboy;

and therefore,

  • Once the first wave of sexual harassment claims hit, there will be a severe labor shortage in the Ivory Tower.

And from that, adios higher ed bubble.  Are you really going to go a quarter million in hock to send your precious little Stacy off to the barn where the few remaining classes are taught (by only the most desperate job-hungry losers), knowing it’s 100% certain she’ll be almost raped?

College kids today act as if — no, scratch that, they demonstrably believe, with all their hearts and souls — they deserve a gold star and a cookie just for rolling out of bed in the morning.  They have no idea that “hard work” and “success” aren’t the same thing (and their definition of “hard work” is “putting the PlayStation on pause and only responding to the most important text messages for twenty minutes while googling up something to copy-paste”).  Anything less than an A+ is a catastrophe, and by definition nothing’s their fault, so they’ll do whatever it takes to correct this gross injustice…

… and, not coincidentally, get heaped with praise for striking yet another blow for Social Justice.  They’re all mouth-frothing Marxists, these eggheads, but not even Marxists are dumb enough to miss which way this wind is blowing.  Right now they’re at the “Denial” stage of grief — it’s only a few creepy CisHetPat white males who are getting accused, and they deserve it! — but it’s already shading into anger (I know it’s hard for the uninitiated to tell, but trust me, the shrill blue haired brigade is getting even shriller, and yeah I didn’t think that was possible either, but there it is).  What’s left?  Bargaining?  They know better — after all, they’re the ones who spent all of freshman year teaching the blue-haired nose-ringers how to dye their hair blue and pierce their septums.  Depression?  They’re already maxed to the max on Prozac.  All that’s left is acceptance…

….and finding another job.  Get ready for the Great Ivory Tower Cat Lady Exodus.  I’m penciling it in for 2021.



Our Side of the Rhine

The Romans were a (justifiably) proud people, but they were no chauvinists.  A bare-assed, long-haired Gaul wouldn’t get very far in Roman society, but his son might, and his grandson would be as Roman as they come.  Just a generation removed from Julius Caesar, the famous three divisions of Gaul were the peaceful, prosperous heartland of the Empire.  Antoninus Pius, the most peaceful of the “Five Good Emperors,” actually was a Gaul.  The best, cheapest way to secure your borders against barbarians is to civilize them.

Caesar’s Gallic Wars is worth reading for a lot of reasons, but especially to see this outlook in action.  He, like most Romans, subscribed to what we might call a laissez-faire mission civilisatrice.  His attitude, in the parlance of our times, ran something like this:

This is the border.  You are free to be blue-assed savages on your side of it, raping and killing and eating each other to your hearts’ content.  If, however, you want to embrace the comforts of civilization, we’ll give you as much of it as you can handle.  Bring your dysfunctional barbarian shit onto our side of the Rhine, though, and we will slaughter you to the last man.

Which brings us to Black History Month (betcha didn’t see that coming!)

BHM is designed to be divisive.  Black Americans simply are Americans; Black Americans’ culture is Western Culture.  The historical process by which that happened, though awful, is irrelevant, in the same way that Antoninus Pius’s provincial origins were irrelevant.  (Caesar’s campaigns in Gaul weren’t just slave raids, but one hell of a lot of Gauls ended up enslaved).

BHM is, in fact, deeply counterproductive.  Modern life is the easiest, safest, and most pleasurable existence in the history of the human race, and it was built almost entirely by the scientific junior varsity — engineers, tinkerers, “rude mechanicals” (the truly towering intellects are all theory guys).  Judged by the B-team’s standards, George Washington Carver was an impressive dude; he did a lot with a little, and human life is better for it.  Judged as the intellectual apex of his race, though….

It shouldn’t be that way.  In this one sense only, race really IS a “social construction.”  We white folks, even those of us who are, say, Bulgarian, don’t sit around ranking the greatest Bulgarian scientists*, pissing and moaning if our top guy is three notches below Isaac Newton.  Western Culture is vast, it contains multitudes, and we all did our bit.

Now, before you start that all-caps comment about how this is just another cuckpost about Dems r tha real rayciss, please note the argument I am NOT making: Blacks are part of Western Civilization; therefore we’re all equal.  I’m well aware of the average Black IQ, and its likely implications in a highly technological society.**  The argument I AM making is: Bulgarians are no great shakes either, IQ-wise — the Italians, apparently, wipe the floor with us, if you can believe that Bologna — but since Bulgarian-Americans don’t go all-in on a cosseted, histrionic  grief culture, nobody has to pay a bunch of extra taxes, write off entire cities, and live in what amounts to a police state to avoid Bulgarian-American social pathology.  Bulgarian-Americans are happy just rolling with Western Civ.

If we want to start reclaiming Western Civilization, we must first acknowledge that we’re talking about civilization — which entails its opposite, barbarism.  If you want to come over to our side of the Rhine, I for one am happy to have you… provided you play by the rules (“having rules” is step one in the civilization process).  You may not make it all the way to the top of our civilization, but you can certainly be happy here, and contribute your bit.  Ask the Gauls… or, better yet, the Thracians.


*This being the internet, there of course are ranked lists of great Bulgarian scientists, but the very fact that these lists are created by Internet People should serve as a built-in refutation.

** Jesus, though, that list is brutal.  One wonders how the authors haven’t been reeducated to death by now.

Cognitive Killswitch

George Orwell described crimestop, the bedrock survival principle in Airstrip One, like this:

CRIMESTOP means the faculty of stopping short, as though by instinct, at the threshold of any dangerous thought. It includes the power of not grasping analogies, of failing to perceive logical errors, of misunderstanding the simplest arguments if they are inimical to Ingsoc, and of being bored or repelled by any train of thought which is capable of leading in a heretical direction. CRIMESTOP, in short, means protective stupidity… orthodoxy in the full sense demands a control over one’s own mental processes as complete as that of a contortionist over his body.

And that, our Nine Regular Readers, is why Millennials suck.

It used to be that the main thing wrong with Our Betters, The Liberals, wasn’t so much what they didn’t know, but that what they did know wasn’t so, as various folks apocryphally said.  After that, it was just plain ignorance.  Both of those things are correctable, should one want to (or be forced to) get corrected.  The problem nowadays is that they’ve mastered crimestop.  Facts — which to them are synonymous with “opinions” — can’t get through.  That armor’s too strong for blasters.

Harpoons and tow cables don't work, either.

Harpoons and tow cables don’t work, either.

Imagine yourself a properly goodthinkful priest teacher, preaching teaching students the catechism History.  What you’re teaching is, of course, mostly lies, but they still have to contain a grain or two of truth, for verisimilitude.  It’s child’s play to get the dullards to simply memorize the right answer, copy it down on the test, and forget about it.  The brighter ones, though, might get to noticing things.  Things like: “even though we spent most of the school year on Phillis Wheatley, Harriet Tubman, George Washington Carver, and The Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King Junior, it still kinda seems like white men pretty much did, said, and invented everything useful.  Yeah yeah, it’s cool that there are 300 uses for the peanut or whatever, but that doesn’t really stack up against ‘all the rest of agriculture,’ plus antibiotics, math, the phonetic alphabet, and everything short of fire itself (and I bet it was one pale-ass caveman who figured that out, too).”

It’s not enough to say, as the Afrocentrists maintain, that Honky stole everything from those who wuz kangz, as there’s far more physical evidence for the life of Jesus Christ than there is for Afrocentrism (suck it, atheists!  Afrocentrists, too).


Nor is it enough to say that The Man is keeping wymyn down via Teh Patriarchy, because again, you can refute it Samuel Johnson-style.  Take a look around — a mere 40% of high school teachers are men; the lower grades barely crack double digits.  Given that two-parent families don’t exist anymore, the last time a grade school boy saw a male authority figure was never.

The logical conclusion:  If they haven’t — despite every conceivable opportunity and umpteen zillion programs, quotas, set-asides, and awareness-raising campaigns — it’s because they can’t.

And we can’t be having that.

The only way to get around it is to go all-in on teaching crimestop.  You can’t consciously teach people NOT to think, though, so what you do is 1) bury them in trivia, and 2) immediately and brutally punish any deviation.

1) is self-explanatory, and the reason why all high school students hate History.  They’re forced to memorize every known fact about Harriet Tubman’s life (all three of them), and quite a few more fakey-fake bullshit ones, while that whole “Civil War” thing gets a single passing mention.  Make them memorize enough trivia about the trivial, and their brains will be too stuffed to wonder what the point is.

2) is accomplished by changing the facts without warning.  It’s Global cooling warming cooling Climate Change on a grand scale.  It’s a fact because the Science is Settled!, and Settled Science ™ can never be questioned, even when yesterday’s Settled Science is 180 degrees away from today’s.  See also “gender;” “homosexuality, genetic basis of;” “homosexuality, cultural basis of;” etc.  Since what got you the gold sticker today gets you reeducation tomorrow, it’s best not to do anything other than memorize today’s fact and write it down in the test blank, fingers crossed that it doesn’t change between the time you remember it and the time you finish writing.

Thus, by the time they get to college, they not only can’t make a logical deduction or follow a chain of reasoning, doing so actually scares them.  Safe spaces for everyone!

This is Only a Mystery if You’ve Never Met a Young American

Why is narcissism increasing among young Americans?”, a very very concerned therapist asks in Psychology Today.  You can read the bit if you want to savor some canned hypotheses: lack of play, intense competition, self-esteem culture.  But since life is short, and my experience with young Americans is long, I’ll just tell you:  It’s the hoops.

NCLB comic

Today’s young people are indoctrinated from birth to believe the following two propositions:

  1. there is nothing in life more important than “achievement;”
  2. achievement is simply a matter of jumping through hoops

Every time I assign a paper in class, the most common phrase out of students’ mouths before the due date is: “so you want me to say that ____.”  After graded papers are handed back, the most common phrase is: “But I worked so hard!!!”

They don’t see anything wrong with either of them.  They really do come to my office hours, in ever-increasing numbers, to ask me what to write on their midterms.  When I point out that they’re effectively asking me to give them the answer — thus defeating the purpose of a “test” — they give me blank looks.  They’re not acting.  Kids these days are oppressively, monomaniacally literal — they can’t act.  They genuinely don’t get it.

Nor do they get it when I point out that not all efforts are successful.  “But I worked so hard!!!” is a description of a behavior, not an outcome.  If hard work always worked, I’d be in the Major Leagues right now, because nobody ever worked harder than me at hitting a curveball.  Alas, I lacked talent.  They can’t process that, either.  They’re convinced that results are always proportional to effort.

And the sad thing — the reason “narcissism”* is on the rise among young Americans — is that they’re right, for a specific value of “effort.”  You can get anything you want in the American educational system; it’s just a question of how far you’re willing to go.

Start at the base of the victim pyramid.  Every educator in America, K-thru-PhD, knows We Do NOT Fail the Blacks.  The Blacks know it too, I assure you.  Then there’s the females.  A female student with less than an A, is a female student who will be in tears in your office right after class, wailing how you ruined her life because she tried soooo haaaarrddd!! and she’s already been accepted to law school (sadly, I believe this part) and now it’s ruined!  Before you tell me to man up and just flunk the bitch, please google “Jackie Coakley“.  Also “Mattress Girl.”  You think #MeToo is gonna end with with Hollywood?  Academia is full of dorky, pathetic, unsocialized guys, surrounded by pretty girls who obviously want something from those dorky, pathetic, unsocialized guys.  Student loan default isn’t going to pop the higher ed bubble; hashtags will.  Give the ladies what they want… and for God’s sake keep your door wiiiiiide open and talk VERY LOUD while you do it.

And so on down the line.  And yes, even Chad Thundercock has a way out — he’s a paying customer; Mr. and Mrs. Thundercock are determined to get their money’s worth for their little snowflake.  If the Dean fires me, there are 5000 other fools in grad school right now who’d be happy to replace me, working twice the hours for half the pay.  If Chad Thundercock fails out, there’s less money to fund research sabbaticals.  They’re all mouth-frothing Marxists, these ivory tower types, but they’re ruthless enough capitalists to give Gordon Gekko wood when it comes to their own paychecks.  So Chad gets an A, too.

See what I mean?  Success — the most important thing in the world — depends only on how well you whine.  No wonder they’re all narcissists.


*”Narcissism” isn’t really what we think it is.  We tend to think of a narcissist as grandiose, which is actually a separate (though often comorbid) pathology.  “Narcissism” is best defined as “seeing yourself as the star of your own personal movie.”  See here for lots of great insight (be prepared to lose yourself on that site for a few days).